Thursday, April 30, 2009

Florida is Scary #4

A 13 year old Autistic boy took his Fathers SUV to an airport where he boarded a flight for Chicago. He was so successful at getting there that he bought another ticket to San Jose California. From news reports the boy is fascinated by aviation. From reports of employee's, he pestered them with constant questions about how stuff works. The boy didn't do anything illegal, aside from boosting Dad's ego machine, he didn't have to show ID as he was under 18, he bought his ticket, checked his luggage and took off. It's a bit of an embarrassment that he managed to get so far. When asked where he was going he is quoted as saying I wanted to go see my Mom.
Warning to Floridians. Autistic 13 year old's are fleeing the state as quickly as possible.

IRS can't spell either

While gritting my teeth and reading over an irs letter outlining why they are owed $345 from a couple years ago I came across this line.
4. Complete and return the installment Agreement Repuest (enclosed envelope --page 3.

This one is from CP2000 (Rev. 11/2004)

Meaning that it's a form letter sent out to anyone they think owes them taxes. Spell checker folks, it's your best friend. Especially if you are in a professional field. Especially if millions of people are likely to read it. No wonder so many people think the irs is full of idiots.

Florida is Scary #3

21 polo horses died from a goof up at a pharmacy. Apparently it wasn't an easy death, go to sleep and wake up in Horse Heaven type deal. These beautiful animals owned by the Venezuelan-owned Lechuza polo team began to collaspe shortly before the U.S. Open match. Must have been quite a shock to everyone including a crowd of reportedly "well-heeled" spectators. A polite way of saying the rich and famous. Although honestly who would be at a polo match if they weren't well heeled. The rest of us work regular jobs. I'm waiting for Hugo Chavez to call this an evil plot from the great white devil to dominate the polo field. What a shame the horses died. I've lived around horses my whole life and find them to be rather intelligent beings capable of love and disdain. This isn't a crime story....yet. But it fits the category of Scary stuff from Florida.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Florida Story #2

Some kid in Sarasota Florida was walking down main street carrying a confederate flag. Another kid took exception to the flag and shot him in the chest with a 22 pistol. Now that's not especially wierd for florida, but if it happened in Kansas City people would be hysterical. In Florida it only got an honorable mention in the role call of strangeness.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Beyonce' and me

Holy Smokes, I'm into pop culture. Not only do I know sort of who Beyonce is, I have heard her sing 2 songs and liked them both. The cover for "At Last" that Ella James claims to own but was in fact a 1941 song written by Mack Gordon and Harry Warren for the musical film Orchestra Wives, starring George Montgomery and Ann Rutherford. It was first performed in the film and on record by Glenn Miller and his orchestra, vocal by Ray Eberle and Pat Friday. The song was a major hit for Miller, reaching number 14 on the Billboard pop charts in 1942, and it soon became a standard. Nat King Cole recorded it in 1957 on his number one album Love Is the Thing. In 1960, it was covered by blues singer Etta James in a performance that improvised on Warren's melody. James was inducted into the Grammy Hall of Fame in 1999 for her rendition of the song.
But I digress. There is a video making the internet rounds of 100 single women singing and dancing in Picadilly circle in London. The song is by beyonce. Something about if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it. I'm a single lady might be the title. I loved it. One of those catchy tunes you can't get out of your head. Good grief, I'm an aging hippie. I thought all music stopped around 1975 or so. What an eye opener this was.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Florida is Scary #1

Has anyone other than me noticed how dangerous Florida is to little white girls? Jessica Lundsford, Caylee Anthony, Haleigh Cummings and Sandra Cantu being perfect examples of this crazy state. Not sure on the spellings so I won't continue to list them but I'm sure you can easily name a few more. I wonder if little black girls are also being kidnapped, raped, murdered? I do know of a little black boy who is missing named Adji Desir but you don't hear much about them which is kind of scary all by itself. I put little Adji's picture up here in case anyone has seen him. He's only 6...just a baby really. Too young to be gone so long from home.
It's not just the missing little girls, it's wierd stuff. The news reports are full of them. I have a dear friend that works in law enforcement in Florida and I'm happy to call her and make fun of each new and wierd report. I think I'll start keeping a log of events to bolster my point here. Florida is scary.
My boyfriend/fiancee/constant source of irritation wants to retire there. Is he nuts? The only people who truly like Florida are the millionaires who live along the beaches. They are rather insulated from the regular folks. The Relocated New Yorkers like to say they are happy there, but I'm not convinced. I think their Grandkids like having a cool place to go visit Granny. Billy Jim Joe Bob lives further inland. They really do have wierd swamp refugees that only see the light of day when they run out of cigarettes and have to come to shore. Okay Okay I'm a rotten person for making fun of our local oddities, but come on. I saw Billy Jim Joe Bob get bit by a snake at a tourist attraction only to hear him say, as he sucked his wrist) it was okay cause the snake had round eyes, not slits. He discovered this by holding the snake up by it's tale to peer into it's eyes. See what I mean? Definately a scary place.
That's a good idea. I'm going to collect Florida stories along with my collection of misspellings in professional letters. Got a good one last night from USAA in which they misspelled the word professional. That was a total hoot. Prfessional. Don't those multi million dollar corporations use spell checker?
Enough, I'm rambling